Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

Mew · Jan 13, 2009 8:11 PM

Summary: Spyro, Cynder, and Sparx fail in a variety of ways. Some are critical, some are minor. All of them are humiliating and stupid.

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Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro is a serie of small, humorous one-shot stories that describe various ways in which Spyro and other major characters in the post-reboot Spyro franchise could have failed in their quest, often in lethal ways.

The stories are meant to be more humorous than dramatic ; you are meant to laugh at how ridiculous and over-the-top the deaths prove to be. In many of the cases, the characters bring the consequences down upon themselves either via absence of the mind or just plain ignorance.

Now, I am proud to bring this serie to this forum.

Comments, suggestions, and the likes are not only accepted by encouraged ; don't hesitate to post a review, state your opinion, or ask questions.

Now, enjoy!

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ENTRY #1

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Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

Ignitus Training Session Blooper

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"I have a gift for you, young dragon." said the elderly red dragon as the statue in the center of the room was lowered, the room changing shape.

And then, as the realization struck the young purple dragon and the yellow dragonfly that followed him, their expressions changed from awe to utter annoyance.

"Oh great! School!" whined Sparx. The purple dragon nodded, a rather noticeable frown on his expression.

Ignitus's content expression quickly soured and he bent down, staring deep into the younger ones' eyes, his gaze suddenly very much terror-inducing.

"This unlike any school you might have attended before, young one!" he replied suddenly, in a rather dry tone.

As suddenly as anger had risen, as suddenly it vanished as the red dragon turned around and slowly walked toward the other end of the room, resuming his explanation as if nothing had happened.

As Ignitus walked away, Sparx recovered from the scare he received a bit earlier and turned to his adoptive brother.

"We're REALLY going to play along with this guy?" he asked again, his tone even more flat than before.

"I'm not sure. That wasn't exactly the kind of gift I was expecting..." replied Spyro, looking down.

"... and that is how-" Ignitus interrupted his explanation, glancing to the younglings as he realized that they were ignoring him. He turned around quickly, facing them once more.

"Young dragon! Are you listening to me?"

Considering that Ignitus was currently staring at them as if they were thugs owing him money, the two figured it was in their interest to cooperate and both turned to the Guardian, nodding energically.

"Yes Yes! We are!" blurted out Spyro.

The Guardian stared flatly at the purple dragon before sighing loudly, rolling his eyes.

"Nevermind. Now come over here, young dragon. Your training shall now begin."

Nervously, Spyro moved forward and placed himself just in front of Ignitus.

The purple dragon then waited for instructions... but he quickly cringed as Ignitus begun to once more talk about the nature of things and how fire is a primal element. Geez! Can't this guy just tell him how to breathe fire correctly already?

"-and that is how you..." Ignitus came to the end of his explanation only to interrupt it, a suspicion rising within his mind. "What have I just said now, dragon?"

Spyro's eyes widened as he turned to Sparx. His eyes widened as well. It was obvious they had not listened.

The purple dragon turned back to Ignitus and hesitantly begun to answer. "Err... well... you spoke about... hmmm... the flow of fire... in my veins... and uncommon... thingies?"

Although Ignitus's expression remained impassible, both younger beings made a step backward as they were noticing how the Guardian's tail was beginning to twitch, the older dragon obviously beginning to lose patience.

After a long pause, the red dragon chased away his frustration and proceeded.

"FINE. Then we shall do a basic exercise. Spyro, I shall summon dummies. I want you to follow my instructions and to defeat them in the way I will tell you to."

Spyro listened to the explanation. Seemed simple enough! He walked to the middle of the arena as the dummies begun to form. Surely, that would be easy!

... but soon enough, he found out it wasn't. Not only did Ignitus ask him to defeat them in awkward ways using awkward moves but the dummies, unfortunately, were very much magically animated and for every mistake he did, pounded his muzzle. Sadly, despite being made of straw, their punches were almost as painful as that of the things they were modelled after.

If only he could knock up one of those apes and then crush it while Ignitus was not looking! Would do the same than doing what he asked minus all of the effort. All he had to do is wait for the right moment...

"YAAAAAWN!" went Sparx, bored by the sight. Ignitus turned to him, frowning deeply.

BAM!
BAM!
SQUISH!

When he turned back, Spyro was smiling nervously, standing next to a squished dummy as the others stopped moving.

"Look! I have completed the exercise! I did well, isn't it?"

Ignitus did not say a single word.

"I... did well, isn't it?" he asked again.

Ignitus walked toward Spyro...

"... Ignitus?"

The red dragon stopped just in front of Spyro. Although his expression was one of calm, the elder dragon's left eye was clearly twitching.

"Young dragon, not only do you not listen to my explanations but you have cheated! You are a dishonor to dragonkind!" like his expression, Ignitus tried to sound calm but the true feeling underneath, burning rage, was more than obvious enough.

"I was foolish. I trusted you, even coming out in the open only to have you make fun of me in such a way? If it is to be this way, then I shall act as the tradition dictate and punish you in the same way as Guardians have punished such young dragons accross the ages!"

"Wha-what?" Spyro's jaw dropped as he finally understood what it meant. He kicked into the ground, his tiny limbs carrying him as fast as they could as he tried to get away. "Heeeeeelp!"

FWOOOOOOSH!

As Ignitus's gigantic funnel of flames engulfed Spyro, his scales turned from purple to a dark, unique shade of grey. His flesh inside also turned from fleshy red to a neat golden color as he was toasted to crispy goodness. Not a bad color swap, actually!... but sadly it wasn't exactly a bargain, the cost for such a color swap being his life.

Sparx hovered there, frowning deeply as he saw Spyro fall on his side after Ignitus finished making a barbecue out of him.

"Maybe we should have taken the correspondence course, after all..." he said, scratching his head.

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GAME OVER

Continue?

=Yes=

No

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This thread should be updated quite often with new entries.

Have a nice day!

Torch Firetongue · Jan 13, 2009 8:21 PM

Well, its an interesting start, let me at least say that. To tell you the truth, it was more humiliating than humorous, but that's my opinion, and I can't judge how other people view humor.

Nevertheless, keep going with this. I'm looking forward to seeing more.

-Torch

Oh, and by the way, be sure to check out my story also. 13,000 words and its feeling a lack of reviewing love... If you get what I mean.

DragonOfDrakness1992 · Jan 13, 2009 8:25 PM

LOL XD
Even not Ignitus would have done that.
It was funny, I like it. (^_^)

Mew · Jan 14, 2009 12:00 PM

Torch Firetongue: I'll see what I can do regarding your story.

DragonOfDrakness1992: Glad you liked it!

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OFF: Now for the update... here is entry #2!

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Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

First Fight Blooper

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"RIIIIIBIT!" croaked the Frogweed loudly.

Spyro stared at the thing, a smirk on his face. Yeah, his brother just got eaten but a few whacks on the oversized carnivorous plant would change that soon enough. Being huge and purple did have its advantages after all.

"Come on! Be cool! Give me a hand! My wings are getting moldy!" whined his brother from within the monster, making the purple dragon roll his eyes.

Spyro non-challently waltzed to the ridiculous tube-shaped animal-plant thingy. After bringing his paws together and cracking his neck in anticipation, he winded up and then slammed his claws straight into the plant. As his claws raked through the soft, vulnerable plant's skin, it let out a whimper.

Before the grotesque creature could recover, Spyro chained another strike, slamming his other paw into the creature's side. As the Frogweed staggered, Spyro then stepped backward before thrusting his head forward, slamming his skull straight into the creature. The powerful headbutt sent the Frogweed skidding accross the mudy ground as inertia had its way with the unfortunate creature.

Spyro smiled as he stood there, admiring his work as the Frogweed begun to convulse violently.

The purple dragon opened his mouth in a large, satisfied smile as the plant finally belched loudly, spitting his brother out before collapsing on its back in a surprisingly quiet, dull thud.

SPLAT!

GULP!

Spyro's eyes widened as suddenly and without warning, his air supply was cut off, the yellow dragonfly catapulted right through his mouth and into his throat. Inside, equally in shock, Sparx felt the painful sting of acidic dragon saliva mixed to the crushing pressure of the small space in which he was now stuck, the dragon's desesperate attempts to breathe translating into fleshy walls proceeding to reshape his already tiny body into a tinier still object.

Finding himself with his oxygen quickly running out, Spyro slipped into unconsciousness and collapsed on his side, his face now a beautiful shade of purple-ish blue. Merely a few seconds later, the continous work of Spyro's saliva and the crushing pressure experienced inside of his throat convinced Sparx to cancel his subscription to life as well.

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Far, far away, in the holy sanctuary that was the Celestial Temple, a gigantic robbed, majestic white dragon used magical powers to take out a large book out of the shelves. The book title was reading "Dragon Book of the Dead".

Opening the book at the last page, the Chronicler looked carefully at the freshly painted picture of a young purple dragon. Noticing that a quote was missing under the name "Spyro", the ancient dragon took a quill and plunged it into a bottle full of magical ink.

The Chronicler thought for a short while before writing something and then, once he was done, he stared at his delicate, graceful handwriting with an air of complete satisfaction on his gentle, wise-looking face.

Then, after nodding to himself, he read the entry aloud: "Double KO!"

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GAME OVER

Continue?

=Yes=

No

DragonOfDrakness1992 · Jan 14, 2009 2:01 PM

LOL XD
Funny I like it. (^_^)

Mew · Jan 15, 2009 12:41 PM

New update and with it, a new entry is also added.

The next entry is inspired from a suggestion given by an user from fanfiction.net known as "Planeko".

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Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

Separation Anxiety

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"That thing... it's slowing us down!" groaned Spyro as he yanked on the magical chain again... but it was no use.

No matter how hard they pulled, the chain that now bound the male purple dragon to the black female one did not budge. Pull, yank, trying to bite at it... they were definitely stuck together.

Once more, the humongous, horrible monster brought down its hand.

Seeing the Lava Golem bring its hand down in yet another attempt to squash them, the dragons dashed to the sides to avoid it... but one ran to the left, the other to the right. Both dragons yelped as their air supply was cut short, the chain preventing them from getting at a comfortable distance. Both Spyro and Cynder felt the heat as the building-sized appendage slammed in-between them, the animated lava brushing against their scales...

As the monster brought its hand up, the two dragons turned to each others, the both of them frowning deeply.

"I'm sick of this chain! There has to be a way to get rid of it!" said the purple dragon, his tone betraying extreme frustration.

BAAAM!

The two rolled backward as the Golem joined its hands together and slammed them into the floor before separating them, backhanding each wall at the sides.

And it's then that Cynder had an idea. She smirked, turning to Spyro.

"Hey, Spyro. How much strength do you think that Golem has?"

Spyro's frown slowly turned into amazement as his brain processed the information. Hey, it's true! Every chain, even magical, must have a limit to its endurance. That thing, humongous as a skyscraper, is strong enough to smash entire buildings down. Surely that chain will be no problem for it!

"Cynder, you're a genius!" replied Spyro.

Cynder's smile turned into a seductive smirk as she stood proudly. "Well, I have my moments sometimes..."

Coughing. The two turned to face a golden dragonfly who didn't quite agree.

"I don't want to sound negative but the chain is-"

"Hey! It's obvious you're not the only one with that annoying thing stuck to your neck!" interrupted Cynder angrily, losing her temper for a moment.

"But-" Sparx couldn't complete his sentence that Spyro spoke up.

"Look, it's worth a try."

Sparx couldn't believe this! He just couldn't!

"You're not really going to..."

The two dragons smirked as they turned their backs on Sparx and stared at the Golem. It joined its hands and prepared to deliver a powerful double-handed punch again.

Then, with a mighty roar, it brought its hands down.

BOOOOOM!

"Gotcha!" went Spyro after the two rolled, finding themselves with each of them placed against the back of each hand. Now to wait for it to backhand the walls...

With a second roar, the Golem gathered all of its strength and then spread its hands.

The chain lit up again as the Golem struggled to move, the dragons binding its hands together like some kind of living shackles.

With a final roar, it gathered all of its remaining strength and...

SNAP!

... broke its magical, living shackles!

The two silver snakes quickly landed a few meters back... still connected to the dragons' necks and with the magical chain still intact.

Slowly, Cynder rose her tail and placed her tail blade above her shoulders. Her tail blade delicately pressed against the place where her head used to be just as Spyro brought his left paw to his muzzle to find out that it was gone just like everything else above his shoulders.

Bummer! Seems their necks were weaker than that darn magical chain!

Finding themselves with no heads, Spyro and Cynder figured out that they couldn't just go living that way. Way too embarassing. That and being alive kinda require having a head.

The two soon collapsed, puddles of crimson soon forming underneath the two lifeless reptiles.

Sparx hovered there for a moment before rolling his eyes, sighing loudly.

"Ya know, the plan was to use your heads... not lose them!"

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GAME OVER

Continue?

=Yes=

No

DragonOfDrakness1992 · Jan 15, 2009 1:10 PM

LOL XD
Good said Sparx! XD

Mew · Jan 16, 2009 3:45 PM

OFF: Next entry is up!

Next entry is a blooper regarding the ending of A New Beginning... so if you didn't beat that game yet, I recommend you don't read this one.

Enjoy!

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Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

Spyro saves Cynder!... and fails spectacularly!

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As the last of the shockwaves slammed into her body, Cynder screamed out of sheer pain and anguish. Overwhelmed by her injuries and by the pure malice that was pulsating painfully within her veins, the gigantic dragoness's wings failed her and caused her to plummet pathetically in front of her slayer, defeated.

The almighty Cynder, ruler of the Dark Armies and chosen servant of the Dark Master, had been defeated at long last.

Her strength leaving her, the dragoness let out a weak moan as the gift of her master, all of the dark power he had given her, left her body. Before her eyes, the hazy figure of a dark dragon stood. In a way, it was so ironic. It was a purple dragon who doomed her to this life of guilt and shame, who forced her into this pain, into this servitude... and now, it was the purple dragon, using the exact same power that chained her, that would free her.

Her entire body was numbed by pain and she didn't even have the strength left to try struggling but she couldn't care less anymore. At long last, the shame had ended, the power had left her. She was free and now as Convexity begun to cave in, her power no longer fueling the gate's existence, she would be dragged into the Dark Realm and die, her soul finally freed from the guilt, the dragoness receiving the punishment she deserved for all of the crimes, all of the atrocities, all of the sins she committed against the world...

A certain purple dragon did not think so, though.

"She is just like me!" said Spyro, finally seeing with his own eyes that Ignitus had not been lying. Cynder truly was his age. The dark creature he had fought was a product of the Dark Master's magic, an artificially aged version of the dragoness that now lies before him.

"Come on, quickly! The place is gonna blow!" urged the dragonfly that flew by Spyro's side, struggling against the currents as already, the entire area was beginning to be sucked into the now unstable portal.

But Spyro had no intention of leaving empty-handed. He slammed his claws into the floor and shook his head.

"No! I have to save her!"

Sparx's eyes widened in shock. Did he just hear that? "What? Save the monster that has been trying to kill us?"

Spyro shook his head vigorously. "But she was controlled by the Dark Master!"

Sparx opened his mouth to argue further but as Spyro glanced back, he saw Cynder's broken body already being dragged up the stairs toward the cursed portal. It was now or never.

He chose to act now.

Spyro let go of the floor and allowed the strong currents to send him flying, sucking him toward the portal.

FLASH!

In a flash of purple light, Cynder disappeared in the portal. Panic begun to overcome the purple dragon. No! He couldn't be too late! He had to save her!... even if he must enter the portal to do so!

The dragon flapped his wings with all of the strength he had left and crossed into the unknown, following the dragoness into the hellish dimension that existed beyond the portal...

FLASH!

In the darkness beyond, the purple dragon found Cynder's body. At the bottom of the cosmic eternity in which they were floating, he could witness the fiery vortex of lost souls and evil power. The core of the Dark Realm, the place where all malicious souls go when they die... He would not allow her to sink into it. She didn't deserve to be dragged into it. She deserved to live.

The dragon grabbed into Cynder and at long last, stopped her descent as he used his wings to hover. She was saved. Smiling, he hovered in the eternity, satisfied with how he had just saved the little dragoness.

Yet, as he hovered there, holding her against him, he had this nagging feeling that he was forgetting something very, very important and shouldn't stay here...

... must be nothing. He has to make sure Cynder's okay!

The dragoness groaned weakly before finally coming back to her senses, opening her eyes. Her gaze met with Spyro's and she smiled as she felt his embrace.

"Are you alright?" he asked in a comforting tone.

Cynder opened her mouth to anwser...

"AAAAAAAAAARG!"

... and answered with a piercing, ear-splitting scream. She was almost immediately joined by Spyro as the two's scales almost instantly turned a very, very dark shade of purple, their eyes bursting into chunky salsa as the pure raw dark magic struggled to escape their bodies from every single orrifice in their bodies, turning them into living lamps of sorts. Unfortunately, the light show didn't last too long too as the sheer amount of dark magic forced into their bodies soon caused the two dragons to explode like two fat watermelons being tested by an old lady at a supermarket, sending a colorful flurry of purple, black, and red flying everywhere. Mostly red stuff, though.

"And this conclude your experiment on the effects of the Dark Realm's atmosphere on the unprotected reptilian body. Wasn't that fun?" said the Dark Master, still chained to his Spirit Gem, just underneath the two clusters of confettis that used to be Spyro and Cynder.

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GAME OVER

Continue?

=Yes=

No

DragonOfDrakness1992 · Jan 16, 2009 9:13 PM

These stories are really wired... but funny too. XD

Mew · Jan 19, 2009 9:12 PM

OFF: New entry submitted.

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Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

Floating Islands cutscene blooper

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The floating islands, the very last obstacle between them and their destiny.

Three years had done this to the Realm. As the Dark Realm continued to leak through the gapping maw that was now the hellish portal, an extremely large part of the Dragon Realm had been sucked in, becoming one with the corrupt, fiery dimension.

As they finally passed through the surface of the corrupted land, Spyro and Cynder finally reached the vortex of matter that surrounded the gate itself. At the very center of the vortex, just above the gate, their former home, the Dragon Temple, now lies suspended, converted into Malefor's throne as he was overseeing the end of the world.

As the two young dragons finally reached their destination, the both of them landed on the edge of one of the many debris of the old world which forever revolved around the vortex, drawn ever so slowly towards a fiery end.

Looking back, Cynder saw an absolutely amazing sight. The horizon was an orange, almost red shade of golden, the setting sun casting a radiant, strong light upon the various islands, making them shine like gold. Far underneath, the Dragon Realm appeared in emerald, sapphire, and ruby shades, the land glittering like a fragile treasure as the light of the sun shone upon its scarred surface.

Everywhere, the islands carried fragments of the former Dragon Realm, memories cast in a subtle, gentle light.

"It's so beautiful," said Cynder, in complete awe.

Spyro, hearing Cynder and then glancing back to notice that she was no longer following him, turned back to face her. That wasn't exactly the best time for contemplation with, you know, the world about to blow up and all!

Still, he stepped back towards her, not wishing to upset, and then looked around, wondering why she suddenly stopped... and as he saw the horizon, the sheer magnificence of the world took him totally by surprise. Sure, he had flew many times before but never very high and well, due to his low level of skill at flying, he was always concentrated on trying not to crash. But now?

"Wow... you're right Cynder."

She turned her head, staring at him as she smiled. He turned to face her as well, a smile forming as well. The two felt their weariness and pain fading away, a peaceful feeling bringing comfort to their tired souls and bodies.

The world was so beautiful, so peaceful. They were far from the war, far from the monsters, far from the corruption. Well, okay, they're in the very core of the corruption, at the very vortex surrounding the gate but still, they had rarely heard such complete silence and peace if ever before...

Silence...

"It's so breath-taking... Why would Malefor want to destroy it?" And then, Spyro broke the silence, turning to Cynder once more.

"I... I have no idea." she said, before looking away.

A bad feeling was rising within her heart. But then, she knew. Or rather, she didn't. The end of the world was coming, that was all she knew. She also knew that judgement was coming... but for who, how, why? She tried to convince herself that they would both face off against Malefor and save the world... yet, she felt regret and guilt even now. She felt confused and sad and she couldn't chase away that feeling that regardless of the final battle's conclusion, no one would emerge alive... in fact, she wasn't sure if it would stop the end of the world at all. Malefor had merely initiated the process, after all. What would killing him change?

As she gazed into Spyro's gentle amethyst eyes, she felt that the time had come. It was now or never. Either she would die with the regret gnawing forever at her... or she would proceed and face off against her deepest fears with no regrets. He had cared so much for her, saving so many times when he could have left her to die. Against all logic, against all odds, and even against fate, he had stood by her side, always...

He taught her so much and she felt so... so at peace with him. He befriended her almost immediately and now that they were juveniles, the time spent in the giant Spirit Gem having aged their bodies into puberty, she begun to feel something that she knew about due to her past transformation into an adult but that she never suspected or even hoped she would ever feel towards anyone...

"So... this is it, right?"

He blinked a few times, not sure if he was understanding her.

"Spyro, I know this is awkward but this might be our last moment together..."

"What do you mean, Cynder?" replied Spyro, not liking where this was going.

Cynder sighed and then continued. "When we cross that last gate... it will only be a short glide in the air currents and then... it will end."

As she told him that, he finally understood what she was trying to say. It is true... this is the final moment. Malefor is just beyond and once they have stepped forward, there will be no going back. Although he continued to try and convince himself that he wasn't scared, he knew he couldn't keep it out of his mind. Against past foes, Spyro could always find comfort in the thought that as overwhelming as the odds might be, he was the dragon of prophecy and thus, had an advantage of sorts against them. But... not so against Malefor.

Malefor was a purple dragon, the first one actually. He was the original dragon of prophecy and not only did he wield the same power as Spyro did but, unlike him, he was a fully grown adult and had ten generations worth of experience. Although Spyro knew he had to win, quite frankly, he knew that Malefor was much more likely to swat him away like an annoying bug.

But dying was not what he was really afraid of. He had already accepted the fact that he would stop Malefor or die trying. What truly scared him was the black dragoness that stood by his side. Just as he had saved her so many times, she had saved him. Back at the Temple of Souls, she saved him from being consumed by his powers and not too long ago, she prevented him from giving in to the temptation of the same power that had consumed Malefor. He was not alone, he never would be... as long as she was here for him.

But if she died because of him, if Malefor lifted one claw on her, he... he... he didn't know what he would do. She was the light that had prevented his darkness from turning him into what Malefor now is. And he is the dragon of prophecy. It is his duty to fight Malefor. But Cynder? She was tortured by fate from day one and even now, she is chained to him, forced to fight a battle that isn't hers.

This bond... ever since she had returned to her true shape, they had been friends. Yet, as time had progressed and now as hormones begun to flow, his body larger and older now, he felt that something else was rising within his heart... a new feeling that he couldn't identify...

She was right. This was the final moment before the confrontation. If he allowed this opportunity to pass, he would have none other.

"Cynder..." he whispered to her as he placed himself closer, not noticing his tail beginning to entangle with Cynder's.

She gazed back into his eyes. "Spyro?"

He glanced at the door for a moment. This was his last opportunity... yet, the task had to be done. If they didn't do it, no one would.

Figuring out why he glanced at the door, Cynder smiled sweetly and brought one of her paws to his chin, turning his gaze back to her.

"Half an hour or two... it won't change a thing," she told him.

His worries evaporated quickly. She was right. A few couples of minutes more or less... what was the difference? The Destroyer is still far and surely must beating Malefor not take that much time. Even if he truly was that terrible, the victory would be decisive and quick. Within a moment, either he or they would perish.

Thus, no need to rush. This was their last moment together.

"Cynder..." he whispered back, slowly wrapping his wings around the female, bringing himself forward further as he placed his chest against hers, hugging her. The female whimpered weakly, allowing herself to drift as she hugged him back, a blush quickly forming on her face...

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A loud, echoing groan filled with all of the annoyance in the world echoed in the throne room as Malefor shook his head, bored beyond all measure.

The ancient purple dragon got off his throne and leaped off the elevated platform, slowly walking his way towards a large stone table. Malefor brought his right arm upward and gazed at his wrist, looking at his watch. Seeing the time, the insane dragon let out a loud, long, bored sigh.

Soon, a loud yawn escaped his mouth as he begun to stretch, spreading his wings and raising his tail, the tip almost touching the back of his head as he did. Well, seems like his back pain isn't too bad today at least. He knew he should have kept his exercising schedule while locked in the Dark Realm!

No matter... he's a bit thirsty now.

Turning towards the imposing stone table, Malefor took a large milk carton and served himself a glass of fresh milk. Placing the carton back on the table, Malefor took the glass and slowly made his way back to his throne to drink his milk.

Yes, it was weird of a dragon to drink something that only mammals drink usually but well, if that whelp could be raised by dragonflies and thus, appreciate bugs, why wouldn't he, the great Malefor, appreciate the fine delicacies that are dairy products?

Bah! What does he care anyway...

To pass time, he decided to look at what was written on the milk carton again.

On the side of it were the pictures of two young teenage dragons, one looking exactly like Spyro and the other, like Cynder. Underneath the pictures was the following text:

"Missing. Never shown up at the epic climatic showdown. If you have seen those dragons, please contact Malefor at 1-800-DARK-MASTER."

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GAME OVER

Continue?

=Yes=

No

Mew · Jan 23, 2009 8:45 PM

OFF: No comments this time? I see...

Well, here is the next entry.

Note: Not intended at all (learnt of it after some users commented to me) but the situation shown in this entry bear strong similarities to a drawing made by Razzek. Since her drawing came first, credit go to her for the original idea.

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Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

Girls are scary!

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"If only things were so simple, little one." she had taunted.

Unfortunately for Spyro, she was right. Things weren't so simple, they were even simpler. He'd run up to her, she would wind up and whip him with her tail. He stands his ground and let her come to him and she elbows him in the face with one of those large hook-shaped blades on her wings.

It was a bit late to admit it but Ignitus was right. He wasn't ready to face Cynder and should have just picked up the crystal and ran for it. But now was a bit late for that. His entire body hurt from being thrown around like a rag doll and every time he breathed, it hurt like the Dark Realm. Nearly every bone in his body had been broken or bent in an unnatural way and blood was pouring from the numerous, deep cuts that Cynder's claws and blades had inflicted, tearing through his scales as if they were butter.

Dizziness due to the important blood loss caused Spyro to stagger, the entire world spinning around him. He knew he couldn't give up yet he felt so tired, so terribly tired and sleepy. He couldn't hear Sparx anymore and Cynder was nothing but a shadow in his mind now, his consciousness's grasp of reality weakening.

Seeing her opponent exposing himself once more, the giant black dragoness kicked into the crystalline floor and squidded to a halt just in front of him, swinging her hips as she did so, bringing her long tail down as she did so. Her own physical strength augmented by gravity allowed the giant can opener-shaped blade at the end of her tail to slam into Spyro's side with a deafening, sickening crunching sound, sending the purple dragon flying with incredible force as a loud, pathetic yelp escaped him.

BAM!

"SPYRO!" yelled Sparx, utter horror on his face.

"Spyro!" yelled Ignitus, despite his strength being drained.

Spyro collided against the column and slided off it, back into the floor. Cynder observed her adversary as he struggled to his feet for a moment.

Spyro was completely exhausted. His limbs trembled and his entire body felt as if it was weighting a ton. He slowly got up but then, felt a strange coldness rise within him, calming his mind. Feeling his eyelids close by themselves, the purple dragon fell on his side, letting out a loud sigh as he collapsed, defeated.

The dragoness observed the purple dragon for a moment, to see if he was going to get up. But he remained there, his strength gone.

Slowly, a sly smile formed on the female dragon's face. The time had come to finish him off. She waltzed to the side of the small dragon, swinging her hips in wide motions as she happily made her way to the small dragon, almost humming to herself as she walked.

As she made it to her foe's side, she quickly circled him, surrounding his body with her own before pressing herself against him, forcing him to stand up as she grasped his body with her own, like some kind of oversized winged snake. Once that was done, she stared down into his face, her smile slowly widening. She observed him as the blood continue to pour from his long, wide cuts, death slowly beginning to come to him as he stood there, barely conscious, only one eye half-opened.

Then, once the blood loss begun to slow down, indicating that almost none of the vital fluid remained within him, death now imminent, Cynder acted.

She bent down and slowly stuck out her tongue before running it up the male from his neck up to his cheek in one wide, slow motion.

"Hey there, sugar... wanna have some spice?" she whispered into his ear in a lust-filled tone, a seductive smirk on her face as she said the words.

Spyro's eyes shot wide open as he was frozen into the state and posture of Cynder's newest boy toy through a heart attack combined to the first stage of rigor mortis. An incomprehensible, pathetic whimper escaped his lips as he failed to express the very last word that would ever cross his mind: "Mommy!"

Sparx just hovered for a moment before sighing, rolling his eyes.

"Well, Spyro, looks like Cynder has transformed you into her newest piece of recreationnal equipment: a doll. Hey, what did you expect? She's a girl! Still, that was harsh and weird! Not only is that an insult to your masculinity but you also didn't survive it. Gah! I guess what they said was true after all... girls ARE scary!"

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GAME OVER

Continue?

=Yes=

No

Mew · Feb 02, 2009 11:31 PM

OFF: Still no replies? Oh well...

If there are readers out there, sorry for making you waiting. Here is the new entry...

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Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

Pirate Fleet cutscene blooper

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In the distance, the last remnants of the once mighty Scavenger pirates' airship fleet were sinking toward the waves.

The apes were truly merciless sparing no one, not even those who would be their allies. As the Scavengers had left the mainlands and approached the outter reaches of the world, a precious reptilian cargo aboard their flag ship, the Fellmuth, the forces of King Gaul greeted their guests... with fiery death. Within a few hours, the last of the airships was seen falling toward the ocean, taking with it the last of the Scavenger pirates. They had captured the purple dragon and the former Dark Queen and thought that they could strike riches by delivering this new cargo to King Gaul... but their only reward was King Gaul's fury, the pirates paying for their arrogance with their lives.

Fate had taunted poor Spyro back at the flag ship's arena, within the confines of Fellmuth. He had left the Dragon Temple to go after Cynder. Why she left so suddenly was still elluding him but he would not return to the Temple empty-handed. He would return with Cynder safe and sound or he would not return. Within the arena, he had finally met with Cynder again. It finally seemed his journey would end... but their attempt to escape was unfortunately short-lived as the troops of King Gaul attacked and captured the female dragon, bringing her away. He couldn't do anything. He was helpless while that gigantic Dreadwing descended and then took her away, carrying her by the wings. After his long journey, he ended up failing...

... but he was not going to let this get to him. He couldn't give up.

The Chronicler... maybe he would help him. He had taken a glance at the pirate captain's map, taking advantage of the chaos resulting from the attack to sneak into his room. All he had to do now was fly to the Silver Isles and find the Celestial Temple...

"Spyro? Are you okay buddy?"

Spyro gritted his teeth as the horizon begun to swirl all around him.

Of all times... why now? He couldn't be fading into a dream right now! He was flying over the ocean!

"Oh no... Please tell me you're just pulling over to go to the bathroom." begged Sparx as Spyro struggled against sleep with all of his strength.

... but he was fighting a losing battle.

The Chronicler wanted Spyro to fall asleep right now and Spyro was going to fall asleep whenever he wanted it or not.

As everything faded to darkness, Spyro felt his grip over reality fade as he plummetted...

Sparx dived straight toward the ocean as he saw his adoptive brother fall toward the waves...

SPLASH!

The purple reptile didn't even feel it as the cold, freezing oceanic waves welcomed his body, wrapping themselves around his unconscious body and dragging him down toward the darkness, his lungs now cut off from the precious oxygen he needed to survive.

Just next to him, a gigantic whale swam past as the hatchling sunk like a rock, a small stream of bubbles escaped his throat as continued his descent, the cold, salty water chasing his dream away as it invaded his lungs. Spyro opened his eyes briefly. The very last thing he saw was a small yellow light far away that darted back and forth in the infinity before the last of the oxygen in his blood was consumed.

The purple hatchling closed his eyes anew and relaxed as the last of his strength abandonned him, his body sinking into the darkness never to be seen ever again.

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Within the sacred halls of the Celestial Temple, the Chronicler rose an eye ridge as he stared at the picture of Spyro falling into the ocean and missing the whale by a few meters, sinking into the depths below.

"Hmmmm... that was... not supposed to happen..." muttered the elderly ghost dragon to itself.

The white dragon then rolled his eyes before sighing, boredom gripping him. "Oh well, I guess there is only one thing left to do..."

Slowly, the majestic robbed dragon used its powers to take out a gigantic book out of the many shelves. The title, writen very clearly on the cover, was reading "Dragon Book of the Dead".

As he opened the book at the last page, he nodded to himself as he observed the freshly painted picture of a youthful purple dragon on it, the name "Spyro" writen just underneath. The dragon nodded to himself before noticing that there was something missing on the page.

Using his powers, the Chronicler summoned forth a quill and then, plunged it slowly into a pot of magical ink, and then went to write a fitting quote.

After a short while, the dragon rose the quill from the page, having finished writing the newest entry into the book. The white dragon observed his handwriting carefully before nodding to himself, satisfied. His work completed, he read the entry out loud.

"Down, down goes Spyro. To the bottom of the sea!"

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GAME OVER

Continue?

=Yes=

No

gitgud101 · Apr 25, 2009 7:33 PM

I seem to recall someone of www.fanfiction.net having this exact same... how would I put it? Um... series? Yeah, series. Unless that person was Mew, of course...

Mew!

...what... was that?!?

MEW!

...there is something high-pitched behind me...

Me--

SHUT UP!!! GO, CYNDAQUIL!!!

Hehehehe... sorry about that...

MaxwellTheScribblenaut · Jun 13, 2011 11:56 AM

LOL these stories are weird and funny at the same time. That's why they're so awesome XD

Hodges13x · Jun 16, 2011 10:53 PM

LMAO! Spyro and Cynder getting it in instead of fighting Malefor? Wise choice

MaxwellTheScribblenaut · Jun 17, 2011 1:20 AM

Hodges13x wrote:

LMAO! Spyro and Cynder getting it in instead of fighting Malefor? Wise choice

Oh yeah, that I couldn't stop laughing for an hour after reading that one XD

#1 Jan 13, 2009 8:11 PM

Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#2 Jan 13, 2009 8:21 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#3 Jan 13, 2009 8:25 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#4 Jan 14, 2009 12:00 PM

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#5 Jan 14, 2009 2:01 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#6 Jan 15, 2009 12:41 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#7 Jan 15, 2009 1:10 PM

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#8 Jan 16, 2009 3:45 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#9 Jan 16, 2009 9:13 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#10 Jan 19, 2009 9:12 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#11 Jan 23, 2009 8:45 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#12 Feb 02, 2009 11:31 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#13 Apr 25, 2009 7:33 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#14 Jun 13, 2011 11:56 AM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#15 Jun 16, 2011 10:53 PM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

#16 Jun 17, 2011 1:20 AM

Re: Spyro dies a lot in Legend of Spyro

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