Bully Problems

RedDragonX · Jan 21, 2009 9:35 PM

I prove my point smile

Spyro_For_Life · Jan 21, 2009 10:08 PM

If you're still having this problem at this point, I'll give you my advice, and my dad's. :-P
Mine: Well, ignore the bully at first. If you show fear or even irritation, they will continue the tormentation. If that doesn't work and they start being mean, say something equally mean. Do so in a low voice. It works with me. If they try to get physical, well... Here comes my dad's advice:
Dad: Whup that a** down.
If you get in trouble, that's fine. You fought in self defense, and anyone who gets mad at you for that is just insane. My parents tell me that if someone tries to punch me, or kick me, or even shove me, knock them to the ground and walk away. And I won't be in trouble with my parents.
I know, my advice is terrible, but everyone is raised in a different household. If I got beaned with a ruler, I'd bean the thrower with a freakin stapler.
Hope this helps. smile

Swaffy · Jan 21, 2009 10:16 PM

I have been through my ration of being bullied, too. Every year of middle
school...

6th grade, a dude got mad at me for moving his binder. Apparently, he
took it as if I was harassing him by mistreating his belongings. If I can
remember, I was pretty calm with the situation. I tried talking him through
it, saying I only wanted to help out... or something... And after the class
was over, and I was bent down at my locker [bottom lockers...], he snuck
up behind me and slammed my head into the steel sides of the locker. I
had a huge welt on my forehead, and me being an odd 6th grader, I cried
and a teacher came up to me and helped me out.
- At the point, I ended up winning the conflict. Not because I could have
turned around and smacked the hell out of his face, but because I
remained calm and didn't talk smack back to him.

The rest of my middle school years also included "fights". But I never
fought back, as it was the mature way to go. At the end, everything turned
out well, because I always talked my way out of situations.

My 8th grade year. During GMR [General Mechanical Repairs] class, some
jerk was [aah fuzzy memory] ... messing around with me the whole
period. He was teasing me, and doing ... something ... that really *bleep*ed
me off. So i got a screwdriver and jabbed it at the side of his head. Like in
the movies, he said, "I'll see you after class, punk." So I was getting a bit
afraid, because I knew that my madness just caused even more madness.
And class ended. I had walked out of the building, out to the sidewalk to
head to my next class, when he came up to me and told me to go with him
to the restroom to "have it out", as he was saying.
- I talked him out of it. Even as I looked behind him at his friends, im
whom were watching from inside the building. After about 2-5 minutes of
talking to him, I got myself free to move on with life. Unharmed.

Talking to people really helps. People are just being deusche bags and
keep saying "Go violence. Violence is the answer." When fighting and
violence only makes everything worse.

Just stay calm about any situations. Trust me. I lived life in public school...

Being yourself is a good thing. Not bad. Putting on a "mask" to think people
are something different is the wrong road to travel.

Dimensional spyro · Jan 22, 2009 8:38 AM

I always used to get bullied. But don't overeacte she should just ignore him and the bully will stop because bullys only do it to get a reaction. When my brother sylver had a bully problem and one day the bully wouldnt let him into the classroom and I told the bully that being mean got him nowhere.

Spyro_For_Life · Jan 22, 2009 11:55 AM

I've never actually been bullied, I've just been told what to do if I'm punched. *cough*pwn them*cough*
However, I have beat up a little kid for taking my ball. I was two years old and I was in a nursery, this boy takes my ball.
Me: >-( (Punch)
The boy: MOMMEEE!! (Runs away, dropping my ball)
Me: big_smile Ball!

A Guy · Jan 22, 2009 10:05 PM

Well, some kid used emotionally bullying on me before, but I beat him up when he tried to move on to physical bullying... so knowing self-defense really helps.

Anyways, ignore the bully if possible. If bullies don't see that what they're doing is working, they'll give up. Also, many bullies find it hard to bother a nice person.

CoolerThanYou68 · Jan 23, 2009 3:29 AM

Not me I make fun of all the ugly kids, even if they're nice I find it easy to make people cry, its almost too easy!

big_smile :*bleep*in:

bmah · Jan 23, 2009 3:46 AM

Just a word of notice on the self-defense logic: just make sure you don't overdo yourself when defending against someone else; i.e., use reasonable force. If someone punched you, throwing a desk at him is probably not excusable self-defence.

RedDragonX · Jan 23, 2009 4:03 AM

If somone punches you that's considered life threatening. You can do anything in your power to defend yourself if need be. If I have to throw a desk on someone to keep them from attacking me further I'm going to do it. Stay with a group and that way you can avoid conflicts such as that...but if someone keeps coming at you aggressivly and you have no other choice then do what you have to do to stay in one piece.

bmah · Jan 23, 2009 6:01 AM

The best thing to do indeed is to avoid that kind of stuff in the first place.

I've noticed that people in the US seems to more often than not have the kind of attitude you have in terms of self-defence. But there's also that many more crazy, irrational people when you live in a country with a larger population. When I was down at California, I was highly surprised that my dad's friend always had a gun in handy in his pocket/waist. I think that's kinda overdoing it, but he claims that there are a lot more wackos out there than, say, Canada. Maybe there's a greater inherent risk of being harmed by some crazy dude down in the states.
That's not to say that I'd act totally defenseless in the midst of a dangerous person. But there's a law that force, if used, should be reasonable. And of course, that depends on who we're dealing with. Yeah, if someone was going to kill me and I had a gun, I'd use it. But I hear a lot of stories of unnecessary overreaction, and in the end, being overly aggressive in a situation that doesn't require it is going to get you in trouble. I could've probably gave a better example than the one in my previous post.
Reasonable force certainly isn't a concept I made up - it's real. As a precaution though, please don't confuse it with being nonaggressive and passive.

Spyro_For_Life · Jan 23, 2009 12:03 PM

I wouldn't use reasonable force depending on the situation. When push comes to shove, say hello to the faceplant! :devil:
If someone punched me, I'd knock them to the freakin curb. (Or into the metal doors of the lockers. Depends on where we're at)
People would probably only try to pick on me because I'm a girl, and apparently I'm defenseless. Let them think that. They won't know why they're suddenly on the ground.... <.<
Anyhow, I'm only talking about what you do if it comes down to violence. If they're just talking crap about you, keep walking. Show them that you don't care, and they aren't profiting from it. I've been doing it my whole life! big_smile And look where I am by this point!
Whoa. O_O Long post.

Hail The Ice Dragon · Jan 23, 2009 7:47 PM

Well, that is just mean. I would tell the principal. If it is a problem on the bus, report it to the bus driver and ask her to keep an eye on that kid or ask her if she could do something about it. Red lump,ruler,boy,girl? Boys aren't supposed to hit girls. Girls aren't suppose to hit boys either. In my opinion, he should be suspended from school or have detention.

RedDragonX · Jan 23, 2009 9:29 PM

Well then bmah by all reason give a better example. All I'm saying is that if you find yourself in the position where you are threatened then you have every right to defend yourself through any means neccessary. Yes it is much better to avoid the conflict all together...hence why I have mentioned in just about every one of my posts that you should stay with friends or stay in a group.

Anyone with a sensible head on their shoulders no where their limits are when it comes to self defense. Yes if someone charges you then you have every right to defend yourself however neccessary. I look after myself and my own...what other people do I could really care less. I simply defend myself by any means if someone threatens myself or someone I know. If you can settle thing peacefully then that's the thing to do...but if it came down to physical contact then you are well within your rights to defend yourself however you see fit.

Swaffy · Jan 24, 2009 12:30 AM

Oh, ye with little faith.
[Not you, RedDragon.]

Wolfgurl989 · Jan 24, 2009 3:20 AM

When I was in Pre-K There was a dude named Vincent (I will not mention last name) And every day I was with my friends he would just walk up to be and punch me in the stomach. AT the time I was to scared to go to the teacher about it. (I admit sadly that then up until a few years a go I have been a wimp, but now I will stand up for myself!) I just waited until we went to a diferent school.
And also a few years ago when I was in fourth grade these girls made fun of me bacause I made up my own friends and played b myslef (I had just gotten there two days ago and didn't know anybody...cmon!) And they called me imaginary firned girl all the time. One day when only one of the girls was there she was sitting by herslef on the swingset seeming lonely, so I went to sit by her, She kindof stiffened up like I was about to start yelling at her or something...I had a nice talk with her and she seemes like a nice person when she wasn't around her 'Friends" (Angry thoughts!) I asked her if anything was wrong with life outside of school after a while and she didn't anwer...but she never hung out with the ohter two people that were calling me names again!

Guys, talking things out with them when there alone and helping them understand that life is okay works. It helps turn here bullying around beleive me!

(A VERY LONG POST SORRY!)
ANother time when I was at school this girl was making fun of my friends skort (it was a little to short) and she just kept on and kept on my friend. I finally got angry so I said. "Really...who cares?" I said it calmy. ANd then she kept tyring to put me off by insulting me but I just kept calm and put a look on my face like (How long are you going to keep this up? I don't care) she kept getting maddre and madder because I wasn't getting all mad and freaked out. Finally class started and she shut up (I hate that girl, this was actually a few days ago.) But really staying calm and talking helps!

RedDragonX · Jan 24, 2009 3:28 AM

Nothing wrong with long posts lol...technically the longer they are the better. Anyways when you are in that age group yes talking to others can really help as opposed to just more verbal confrontation....that also works much more when it involves females instead of males.

As you get older and go through HS, however, you will run into many more characters who want nothing to do with talking to you and are just miserable out of pure spite. They don't care what you think...they don't care how you act. All they can think about is causing you misary because it makes them feel better about themselves. This is especially dangerous with teenage males...for they will result to physical confrontation to prove this point...and they will not be willing to listen.

It's different as people become older and mature....but yes talking does always help instead of other means...but be careful about that as you get older...for the older someone is when they abuse you...the less inclined they will be to "negotiate" with you.

Wolfgurl989 · Jan 24, 2009 3:36 AM

I have kindof noticed that boys (Sometimes) are more proned to go straight to fighting than talking things out the older they are....especially the ones that don't feel very good about themselves. I wonder why that is...

Wolfgurl989 · Jan 24, 2009 3:38 AM

Is it okay to fight back though (like if there punching you, is it okay to punch back to stop them?) I'm kindof torn between the slef-defense thing and the, I don't ant to make this person mad at me later because they might not understand, thing.
Though you are right I do not have to worry about that kind of thing now in my life.

RedDragonX · Jan 24, 2009 3:46 AM

Well I agree with you that their is a very fine line when it comes to self defense...and yes guys naturally get more aggressive and start thinking about using anger to solve problems rather then reason. That's just one of the faults in the male gender...that the adrenaline really gets us going and acting in ways that we shouldn't...but any truly mature guy would know how to control that emotion and not let it run him.

Wolfgurl989 · Jan 24, 2009 3:53 AM

Yeah..and again...I wonder why.
(If your a christian!)
I wonder if that's one thing that happened when they ate the forbidden fruit in the garden (You know the reason why animals can't talk and snakes crawl on their bellies everywhere)

RedDragonX · Jan 24, 2009 4:39 AM

Hmmmm perhaps...but like I said before...the ones who are mature enough to handle such situations will act like they should....anyone else who does otherwise lacks self control and a level mind.

Jackson117 · Jan 24, 2009 5:42 AM

I got you a idea.

when the bully comes make Hulk Hogan and underground wrestlers come kick some butt.

Joking.

i would call the cops

freak6 · Jan 24, 2009 5:45 AM

hmm. iv been bullied befor you ignore them tell teachers and parents about them and if they hit you BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF EM thats what i have been tought lol

Wolfgurl989 · Jan 24, 2009 1:25 PM

LOL sounds fun if theve been punching you or getting there for a long time! But I don't think some hulk wrestler...people would help...lol this is school!

RedDragonX · Jan 24, 2009 5:27 PM

It's very simple....just stay with friends and in a group. Always have them with you while this so called bully can be around. If you are put into a position where you have to defend yourself then you have the right to do so.

#26 Jan 21, 2009 9:35 PM

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