When I was in school, it didn't matter at what level; elemenatry, middle or high school, I always felt out of place. I either got picked on or degraded because of how I looked, how I dressed, what classes I took, the grades I got, etc., etc., etc. I really didn't hang out or have any"real" friends that I could turn to or trust, and girlfriends...heh, forget it. All of this, and the way that my parents treated me, caused me to become apathetic, indifferent and a loner. I would rather stay away from people than try to meet or confront them.

Now that I'm out of school things really haven't gotten any better. The few friends that I did have have either moved away, are going to college or just don't have the time anymore. My only few "friends" are those few whom I e-mail and chat with online. That is, when I do have time to get online, in between my two jobs and the little sleep that I'm able to get. Both my parents and brother have passed away, so there's no one left in my immediate family. (my older brother committed suicide) I really wasn't close to any of them emotionally, but I miss them, just the same.

Basically, I'm just surviving, living, day to day. I live with my aunt & uncle now. And, the fact that they are going through some very difficult times now, doesn't help my situation, at all. *sighs* Life sucks!! 

hmm...at least your not suicidal(me)...are ya?!

Not at all. Right now I'm loving life. But you shouldn't be suicidal. Just think, you could be in the position you're in, or you could be a starving Kenyan living on numbered days because you have AIDS. Hope that helps : )

As soon as they figured out, I was rushed to detox where I served a 3 week stint. It was really hard to do but ever since then I haven't done anything. I've been sober for over a year.

And I would call that my darkest times

i think a school transfer would have been a better idea than home schooling, school isnt just about learning your maths and english etc. just as much of it is about learning to socialise and interact with people, when youre being schooled at home the only people youre interacting with are your family, and internet communities dont count because theres a huge difference between speaking face to face and what we're doing here

the thing i always found with fitting in at school was that you dont have to be someone youre not, you just have to when to show what parts of who you are, i had a couple of different groups of friends, i was lucky enough to have one or two groups that accepted me no matter what our differences, but with other groups we were more aquaintances than anything else, we could talk about school stuff but not necessarily my love of soft toys.... now im worried i shouldnt have said that out loud..

Kinda hard when NO ONE likes you AT ALL. 
I only need my family, it's good enough for me.  :-|
My family and a few friends online are the only people who actually seem to care about me.

yes....if you mean about bein depressed then yes.......im still depressed.....no one in my life to love......it is an evil world...

by love, do you mean, in general, or specifically a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship

if its the second, then as harsh as this might seem, you need to get over it, youre 16 it was another 2 years before i had a girlfriend and that was only after i got over my silly feelings of depression due to not having a girlfriend, because once i stopped feeling sorry for myself, i realised that im an awesome enough person, and i shouldnt need someone else to make me feel good, and when you start projecting that aura of confidence, thats when you start reeling in the chicks...

ok not reeling them in, but girls are more likely to go out with someone who is already happy because a relationship where each person relies on the other for happiness isnt very stable

if it was the first then do you not love youre family, do they not love you? (serious question cuz some families just suck)